384 | Create Future Memories to Live by Design

One of the things I love to do with my clients is to create future memories. We so easily create past memories. There was a study done that our memory of an event, situation, or experience from the past is very rarely anything like the actual event that took place. That’s because we sometimes remember what we want to remember, or we focus on certain aspects of an event or conversation that cloud what actually happened. We cloud that past memory with our paradigms, with our personalities, with what we pick and choose to remember. So in essence, even our past memories aren't entirely accurate. We use our imagination and a bit of our personality goes into what we remember, and that’s the memory that gets put on loop. 

If we go back and retrieve that memory, we can think about and remember what happened. Well, you can do the same thing for a future memory. Why do we want a future memory? We have a saying in my community which is “live by design.” We don't want to live by default. When we live by design, we are choosing what we want our life to be like. We get to decide that. Obviously, we do not get to decide every single circumstance that happens in our life or what other people may do, but we always have control over how we choose to think, to feel, and to act. Always. No one can take that away from us. 

Listen to the Corresponding Podcast Episode:

Resetting Expectations

With that we get to decide who we want to be, what we want to do, and what we want to have. We get to decide this, but often people are living by default because we're living someone else's expectations. We're living someone else's view of how things should be. It's really rough to do that because you're not living life according to how you want to live it. If you think about the time that we live in, the society we live in, or the country we live in, the time right now, being 2023, there are expectations. Our society has expectations. There are expectations that you have on yourself based on how you were raised, or maybe it's other people's expectations that are still keeping you kind of trapped in the life that you currently have. 

That was me. I stayed 20 years in a corporate career that I did not love, and I felt trapped. Little did I know, I was not trapped at all. I had the total power at any time to make the decision to make a change, but I didn't think I had that choice. I felt trapped. I was a victim. I was being a victim to my circumstances rather than living by design. It wasn't until I started to decide proactively how I wanted my life to be, that things began to change. Part of doing that is that you have to think about what you really want. 

• What do you want the next several decades of your life to be like?
•  What do you wanna be doing? 
• What does a week look like for you? 
• What are Monday mornings like in a life that you're living by design? 

Have you ever thought about what I’ve listed above? When I started to really think about it, it became clear that I really wanted to have my own business. I wanted to be in charge of my own opportunities, my schedule, and what I get to work on and not work on. I didn't want to be at the mercy of someone else making those decisions for me. Once I decided that, I was focused on how to make that happen, but I had to decide that ahead of time. I had to design what I wanted life to look like. I do the same thing now with my business. I know what I don't want. I know what I want. Then, I really work to design my business to fit that vision. To fit what I am working to create. You can do the same thing. The biggest thing that you need to do is decide to be proactive and spend a little time envisioning what you want life to look like. 

Sometimes we try to think so big that it just seems impossible. I encourage you to spend a little time today sitting down and thinking about if you could write the future the way you want it to be:

• What would you be doing? 
• Would you be in the same job that you're in right now? 
• Would you be in the same business that you're in? 
• How would you make money? 
• What would your weeks look like? 
• What would a typical Monday look like, or any other day of the week?
• What would weekends be like? 
• Would you live where you live?

Play with these questions and have fun! Your soul already knows what you truly desire, it’s your mind that’s going to get in the way. Your mind is gonna say, “no, you don't really know,” and it's going to put all the “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” right in front of you, but if you can just go back to your soul and ask those questions and let what comes up come out onto paper. What I like to do is I like to have future memories of how I want life to play out. 

My Future Memories

One of the future memories I have is being in a beautiful house with a lot of light and a lot of white. It's somewhere by the water because through every window of the kitchen, all I can see is water. It's absolutely beautiful. I have this future memory of being in that kitchen, and my daughter Caroline is there, but she's older. She has kids herself. Now she's only 19, but again, this is a future memory. We're in the kitchen, and I'm bent over handing one of my grandchildren water. It's the feeling that I have in that moment, and the feeling is just so grateful, and so happy to have a beautiful place that my grandchildren and children can come to visit to have a beautiful, wonderful time making memories. That is something that I always hold with me. It helps me in where I'm going. It helps me in what I'm trying to create. It helps me in the here and now so that I can show up whether it's to work on my business or make decisions now towards that goal. It's really powerful. 

Future memories are great for your business too. I have a future memory of a book signing. I have a future memory of being on stage in a really big arena helping people with a motivational speech. I have a future vision of me sitting on a couch with Oprah. Even though that seems crazy, it creates a feeling. 

The Feeling is the Secret

I always say that the feeling is the secret. Your frequency is the secret to everything. These future memories create this excitement and this passion. They haven't happened yet, and that's okay. These are visions that you hold dear, so that you are making decisions in the now to help make those future memories come true. 

I want you to think about future memories that you would love to have. Do you want to be loving your Mondays? When you wake up on Mondays there's no pressure, and you love what you're about to do. Every cell in your body starts to vibrate because you're so excited with what you get to do that day. 

• You love the business or career that you're in. 
• You pinch yourself that you are doing the work of your dreams. 
• You are so fulfilled and have so much joy for your life's work and your true calling. 

Because of these things, you are overall a pretty happy person, especially with your children and with your spouse. Your health and wellness is glowing as well because you're so happy and fulfilled. What would that look like? What would that feel like? My shift into being in that state has literally come from my decision to leave a job that I hated and that sucked my soul dry. 

I've often wondered why that was such a catalyst. When I really look at it, the catalyst for the dramatic change in my life, solely coming from leaving a job that I didn't love and didn't feel so fulfilled in, was this – I spent so much of my time in this career, and we only get one shot. We only have so many years on this planet. I felt like I was wasting so many of them in a career that didn't fulfill me, and I knew I was meant for more. I knew in my soul that I was meant to do something bigger, more fulfilling, and soul-based. I knew that so deep in my bones, and I really was kind of depressed, to be honest. It affected a lot of my relationships as well, and my relationship with myself.

I was always trying to find this elusive happiness. I was over shopping, over drinking, over exercising, arguing with my husband, or having huge expectations on my kids to make me happy. I'm getting real vulnerable here, but this was the reality that I was in and just changing my career into something that I love had a ripple effect in all those areas. How cool is that? It's why I'm so passionate about helping more women actually get in alignment with their true soul's calling. I recently did a workshop that I would love for you to check out.

Click here to get immediate access!

The workshop is all about identifying your true calling. Living in your true calling and spending time in that will have the most incredible ripple effect across your entire life, guaranteed. 

I want to again ask you a few questions:

• Are you living your true life's purpose?
• Are you feeling the joy of what you do during the week? 
• Are you feeling fulfilled? 

If the answer is yes, hey, you still might wanna listen to the workshop because it might give you some new ideas, but if the answer is no, definitely watch the workshop. See what comes up for you. See what inspires you. If it really resonates, I highly recommend that you join us in my brand new program called IGNITE Her Calling. You can join a ton of other amazing women who are coming together to really step into their gifts, and into who they're meant to be. We are going to use a tool called the Gene Keys to help unearth and mine out your specific gifts and your specific calling, and then we're going to work together on the path forward to actually step into that calling. 

It is a six month program. When I was surrounded with other women who were going after big goals and dreams, it helped me to step more fully into what I desired. If I’m being honest, there weren't a lot of people in my life that were doing anything like I was doing, and it can feel very lonely. When you surround yourself with other women that are doing what you want to do, and they're on that path and they're discovering their true calling and taking steps forward, it is magical. So, I invite you to come first! 

Check out the workshop here!

Then you can see if IGNITE Her Calling is the next step for you. Go write some future memories. I cannot wait to hear what you think about the workshop, and I hope that you have the most amazing week ahead!

I would love to invite you to IGNITE Her Society. It’s my free community with it’s own mobile app and web interface with a private podcast, as well as all of our upcoming free masterclasses, workshops, and other goodies just for you. If you want to unleash your niche and bring your marketing to the next level to attract your dream clients, IGNITE Her Society is the place for you. You don't want to miss out! Go to www.ignitehersociety.com to join for free, and you will unlock lots of free goodies from me to you on your journey.